"Now just what exactly happened? What knocked me out?"Tarra looked like she was about to cry again; she took a deep breath to regain her composure and said, "It was me. I did it. Not intentionally. When I, ummm ... came that last time I lost conscious control of my chromatophores. My God, I have never cum that hard before in my life." Tarra had to fight back more tears. She looked at him, her expression begging him for understanding, "The excitement of being with you ... I ... I wanted to just let go, lose a little control with you."Tarra reached out and touched his arm. He put his hand over hers and indicated that she should continue. "I shouldn't have been able to release a stunstrobe without actively desiring to do so." Stunstrobe. I think I know what that means," James rubbed his forehead, "You can actually generate light? Not just change colors?" This was incredible. He wondered how she could generate such powerful light."Yes. It is part of the military adaptation. I have. I'd never do that to you. Never! I mean that."She gave me a disappointed, even sad sort of expression. "You can tell me," she said. "I do understand why you're doing it. I'm not insensitive to the fact that you have needs I can no longer meet. Okay? So, tell me who you're seeing. Please? I'm not angry with you for it. Honestly."My heart was still pumping hard in my chest, as if I'd just finished running up a flight of stairs.She squeezed my hand in hers, loosely, because of the loss of strength in her muscles from the MS. "Please tell me. I want to know who your seeing. That's all. I'd like to know what her name is. Please?"Taking in a deep breath, and then letting it out, I said: "I'm not seeing another woman. I told you." But I'm certain your seeing someone else for sex," she replied, now expressing, not anger, but a kind of frustration with my avoidance of answering her question."I'm seeing," I began, and then paused. Then, taking in, and letting out another breath, I said: "I go.
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